Pastor, You Need Friends

Photo by Eber Devine on Unsplash

One of the most valuable and precious relationships I have involves other Christian leaders and ministers in my local community. I’ve made it a priority to cultivate these relationships in order to promote unity and see the kingdom advance further.

Though these relationships promote unity they have been a great blessing to me both mentally and spiritually.

Brian Boyles writing for Facts and Trends says, “I [have] friendships with other church leaders in the community. These… were vital to my personal and spiritual growth…” When things go wrong in pastors’ lives, they need someone to turn to, someone that will pray over them, someone to speak words of encouragement.

Many see the pastor as someone who has it all together, as someone who cannot have any faults or problems. If the pastor did it would prove God is not with him. In spite of this being utterly false many pastors and leaders face congregants that think and act this way. Most pastors feel alone with no one to talk to. 70% of pastors do not have someone they consider a close friend. They have no one in which they can talk to, vent to about ministry, or work through problems about congregants, families, and even their own marriage.

70% say they constantly fight depression. Boyles says, “You need another person in your shoes to walk with you through times like this and other difficult things you’ll encounter in ministry—things you can’t bring before friends you have within your own congregation.”

Though I don’t have a formal congregation, as I am managing a homeless shelter, I do still look for and value the friendship and support of local pastors and ministry leaders.

Thinking through this I am drawn to Jesus. He himself had his select disciples whom he called friends (John 15:15). When he was tired from ministry he sought refuge with his friends saying, “Come with me by yourselves to a quiet place so we can rest” (Mark 6:31). When Jesus was facing his greatest trial he took his closest friends and asked them to pray with him (Luke 22:40, 46), to sit up with him in the night and keep watch over him (Mark 14:36). Jesus fellowshipped with his friends when he was tired. He leaned on them at his hour of suffering. He even needed his friend, whom he loved, when he was upon the cross (John19:25-27).

If Jesus ,our great shepherd, had need of friends who would fellowship with him, pray for him, and look after his personal wellbeing, how much more do we, his under-shepherds, need friends who will do the same?